Is The Commentary In Your Head Serving You?
There is a never ending commentary going on in our heads, even during certain parts of our sleep cycle each night. We are constantly talking to ourselves, even though we are seldom aware that we are doing it. This on-going commentary relates to events we experience and our reactions to those events. Unless you are vigilant, your self-talk can become extremely negative and destructive or limiting in nature. If you constantly bombard yourself with doubt and negativity, especially on a subconscious level, your negative thoughts will eventually become a self-fulfilling prophecy and you will begin to live the negative scenarios, you keep playing out in your head.
These silent conversations you have with yourself throughout the day can either be offered by a nurturing coach or a damaging critic. You can either be reinforcing your behaviour, which will promote your success or you can be constantly criticising your-self, throughout the day and describing your performance as poor or unsatisfactory, where you get to negate any opportunity for growth and development.
Start practicing the art of becoming your own nurturing coach and start to use positive self-talk throughout the day.
Use phrases such as:
· Wow that worked out well.
· Keep going like that and anything is possible
· Well done, keep up the great work.
· What can I learn from that?
· Now we’re in the groove.
· Wow! Things just keep working out better and better.
· Small challenge, how can I do it better next time?
There are many, many more phrases, which can help you, to encourage and nurture yourself throughout the day. Learn about five new positive phrases, which you will consciously practice to say to yourself throughout the day. Like any new skill it will take time to develop and willpower to apply it in your life. At first it is going to seem contrived and almost like you are lying to yourself.
You have spent many, many years honing your negative self-talk skills and you have a whole vocabulary and repertoire of negative self-talk phrases, which you have honed and developed over the years. It is going to take resolve and commitment to undo the habit you have developed.
The trick to make this work for you is to shift the way you look at all the events that occur throughout your day.
· See every challenge you encounter, as merely a temporary inconvenience, a learning experience and an isolated incident.
· See each challenge as a stepping stone, on your journey to success.
· Reward yourself for every success, no matter how small.
· Reinforce every success and stop feeling lucky or guilty for any attention you may get as a result of that success.
· Accept compliments graciously, allowing yourself to feel the positive reinforcement.
· Always look for a positive slant to every event that occurs, each day and search for ways to learn from every one of them.
What metaphors are you using all day to speak to yourself and others?
· Can you have a productive day, filled with learning and growth, if you go to the “salt mine” every day.
· How can you build a great relationship, with your spouse if you constantly call them “Your Ball and Chain”
· See your life as “The school of hard knocks” and that will become your self-fulfilling prophecy about how your life will turn out.
· How quickly do you think you would heal after a break-up or loss, if you keep telling yourself and everyone around you that you “Have a Broken Heart”
· How positive can you be throughout your day if you think that you are “Mentally or emotionally Scarred”
The metaphors we use create a picture, a certain state in our minds and make us feel a certain way. Change your metaphors and you can very quickly change the way you feel and operate.
· You could rather view “life as a game” an opportunity to play hard and get as much as possible from your life each day.
· How about if you saw “Life as Sacred”, would that change the way you viewed things in your life. Do you think you would see everything in your life from a different perspective, when you see your life as sacred? Could you poison your body with chemicals, like tobacco or alcohol, if you saw your body as sacred?
· How would you feel about your career if you viewed what you did every day as “A Dance”. Could that conjure up better pictures about your career?
· Do you think you would see your job as something great and as a daily opportunity to learn and grow, if you viewed your job as “A Gift”
Always remember that any metaphor that you practice or learn to use each day, will have different meaning to different people, depending on your perceptive background. So choose your metaphors wisely, as the meaning they will create in your head, will be uniquely yours and the pictures they conjure in your mind will be specific to you.
Take conscious control of your self-talk and begin to become your own nurturing coach. The benefits that will flow from this new habit will set the foundation for unlimited success.
Author: Andrew Horton Time Management
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